How They Scored

I should totally finish the first draft today. I'm just not really up for it. As I just wrote on my blog, as part of several hours of work-avoidance: I meant to finish the first draft of HOW THEY SCORED last weekend, but I stopped a couple of pages short. I didn't want to rush into it, and -- typical -- I had to be somewhere in the early evening, so I cut my writing day short. Then I thought I would be able to grab a few hours during the week, ideally on Monday, and finish. It was only a few pages. But instead I got utterly hammered at work. In my 12 years in the high tech industry, I don’t think I've ever been as snowed under as I was this week. In fact, I'm seriously considering going in to work on Sunday just to get a head start on the next week. ... Meanwhile, I read a little piece of this book I'm working on for the first time last night to a few people at a dinner. It was a very interesting experience. When you're reading out loud you can instantly tell wh...

Right, I handled that with no problem. I got all the way home with Hap and Meeghan about to go to bed for the final time (in the book). When I went to bed last night I told myself to think about Chapter 10, the chapter where Hap relates his failed marriage to Cara. All along I've been thinking that the best thing I have in real life to use is , of course, my failed marriage to C___. Most of the external details will change, i.e. the whole foreigner-green card marriage aspect, but I want to keep the intimate details. I've never written about C___ before and this is an opportunity to do it in a respectful and complete way. I want especially to use the tender details I remember about her body and her reactions during sex, and also to use her emotional goodness and sweetness. The one thing I don’t have is the exact way they break up, though I might simply use what is close to the truth: instead of Je___, use the affair with S___ that broke up my relationship with S___. It's 9:0...

While reading Henry Miller tonight -- I'm almost to the end of the Rosy Crucifixion, which I have inhaled, along with the Tropics, in order to give energy to my voice in "How They Scored" -- I had the idea that I can skip the entire trip down the mountain. What a bore! Instead, end the current chapter 12 with Bianca popping out of Seth's room, and then cut to the boat. There you can have one last conversation, with Denny -- because I have an intuition that Bart stays behind with Don to lay plans for Dreedle -- while Greg tries to make time with some hikers. Then the whole trip home in two pages -- no, one! The point is to get to the end. I see it clearly. The conversation with Denny can set up, to some degree, the ending, the thing about where your home is. But not too much of that. Lightly, lightly.

Man, really hard to get started today. I wore myself out a little bit yesterday, perhaps. It's after 3:00 already, and in the three hours I’ve been here at my office at Bob's, all I've done is a little additional cleanup of the reorganization of chapters 10-12. At this point I can either: write the long bit on Hap's marriage to Cara (I did decide to spell it with a C, other notations notwithstanding) or: go on in chapter 12, which is where I am. I really should do the latter. I think the Cara thing will have to require special circumstances, such as me taking a whole day off work and going to a motel or something. OK, so onward in chapter 12. They've just eaten dinner and the chickens are about to come home to roost. I had a moment today when I thought -- maybe it should be Don who gives the "Citizen Kane" speech. But no -- Denny has clearly been established as the person who makes film references. Note on (c) from December 1 -- "Hap finds himself re...

I'm working at home one more day. Since I have a date tonight, I don't want to be gone all day. Tomorrow I'll try to work from my office at Bob's, where I haven't worked in like three weeks. I had this thought the other day: Once Don directly asks Hap to recruit Bart, instead of the way I have it now where Hap goes straight to Bart and does that, it should go like this: Hap should do everything he can to keep from doing what Don wants. He runs the other way because he already doesn't like the Dreedle idea. But the comedy is that Bart actually asks Hap for advice, and does it in a way that Hap finds himself talking about the advantages of joining Dreedle. Then later, even though he's tried to do nothing to encourage it, when Bart does announce he’s joining Dreedle, Hap gets credit for it. So in summary: a. Don asks Hap to recruit Bart. b. Hap doesn't like the idea, and does the opposite. c. Hap finds himself doing it despite himself. d. Hap gets credit fo...

Thanksgiving weekend. Working Thursday and Friday, I got in 2800 words, going over the 75,000 mark. That means it's officially a novel-length manuscript. That took four months from the time I wrote the first words; almost five months from the time I began making notes. Not too bad for something I hadn't the slightest inkling of before receiving the call from Felice in April. I finally completed the 4th point from the above list, which means I have 1-5 done. 6 and 7 are somewhat trivial, so with some additional work today and tomorrow, I absolutely should finish the first draft by next weekend. I should say that the work this week has taken place in the context of Thanksgiving, a visit by S., who stayed overnight at our place for three nights (I just got back from taking her to the airport), and the cast on Cris's leg. So I did all this work at home in the office. For somebody with a cast on their leg, Cris was great about letting me work. Letting me sleep is another matter,...

Okay, continuing with that brainstorming about Denny. I'm going to copy it over here so I can continue. Q: What is the important thing to think about w.r.t. Denny, in addition to the main plot points? A: His subplot. Q: Which is? A: His wife Marianne has just left him, he's started using junk again, and he has to decide what to do next. Because he is indomitably wealthy, it's not a matter of how to survive financially, only emotionally and physically. Q: How will going back on heroin affect him? A: It won't, in the short run -- i.e. for the purposes of the book. Q: So do we have to talk about it? A: Only in passing, perhaps as we take leave of Denny for the last time. Q: So the main thing to think about is what? A: His emotional state with his wife leaving him. Q: But that's affected by...? A: His emotional state is affected, i.e. muted, by going back on junk. So we'll have to acknowledge that. Q: Then what's the main thing? A: As...

Last working session I arrived at one of the turning points in the book. Don has revealed his idea for the business, and now he reveals to Hap why he's up there and what Don wants from him: to use his influence to recruit Bart for Don's business, Dreedle. In return, Don will promise to solve Hap's problem with the apartment. As I see it, there are only a few important plot points that remain: Shaun finds out that Hap has been asked to recruit Bart, and tries to dissuade him, warning of the political implications of Dreedle. When this doesn't work, Shaun attempts to sabotage the business somehow. But he ends up getting turned around by Don, who convinces him to invest all of his nest egg, about $4 million, in the company. Seth is telling Hap to go for it. But Seth is also disgruntled that he wasn't thought to be as important as Bart to the new enterprise. Denny again speaks to Hap, holding out the possibility of an alternative that isn't so morally objectionable....

A bit at a loss, my attention fragmented. I've squandered the morning time when Cris is still asleep, and now she's up. I'm working at home all week, but there's not much virtue in that, as most of my attention is taken by Cris, the house, the cats, etc. -- which is why I have an office. But as I'm here, I really ought to try to pay attention. Q: What is the important thing to think about w.r.t. Denny, in addition to the main plot points? A: His subplot. Q: Which is? A: His wife Marianne has just left him, he's started using junk again, and he has to decide what to do next. Because he is indomitably wealthy, it's not a matter of how to survive financially, only emotionally and physically. Q: How will going back on heroin affect him? A: It won't, in the short run -- i.e. for the purposes of the book. Q: So do we have to talk about it? A: Only in passing, perhaps as we take leave of Denny for the last time. Q: So the main thing to think a...

I got an idea for the resolution of the book. My idea up to now has been to have Denny hold out an alternative job idea to Hap and then yank it away at the last minute. Tonight I had an idea of how that could happen. Denny, the former film student, starts talking about the scene in Citizen Kane where Joseph Cotton passes out drunk at the typewriter and Kane finishes his brutal review of Susan's opera debut. When Cotton wakes up, he's told "Mr. Kane is finishing your piece the way you started it.... I guess that'll show you." And then Kane fires him. And Denny goes on to say something that compares him yanking the job away from Hap to that -- something about loyalty to him and not to the friendship... or vice versa.

I had a good weekend last weekend, with just over 6000 words, and I start this weekend at 47,000-plus. Yet I'm increasingly worried about my deadline. If I average 5000 words per weekend from now til Thanksgiving, That will only bring me to 78,000. What I really need to do is average 7000 per week -- nearly impossible without working a four-day week at my job. So perhaps what I'll have to do is "work at home" one day a week. And it would be a good idea to start that on Monday, since Cris has delayed her return from vacation by a day and will not be returning until late Monday night. All right, what am I going to do today? The book is completely out of my mind. I should have prepared by catching up on it yesterday, but I spent the whole evening doing laundry and listening to the ball game. I'll have to catch up now. This is an example of how I still am inefficient when it comes to use of my time. It occurs to me that I still don't have an outline, and that it w...

I wrote about 2800 words yesterday, a not-too-bad start to what is, essentially, the second part of the book -- the part where they will all be in one setting. I say not too bad because it reads all right the way it is, and yet I'm conscious that the second part of the book is that which must build to a climax and since I don't really have a sense of the shape of the narrative arc -- though I have mapped out some conflicts -- I can't say I have done well to start that arc at the beginning of chapter 6. All I did was introduce Seth a little more and have a sex story set against the background of an abortive prank where they're gathering fallen wood to make a sort of sculpture. Silly idea but... It's hard to judge. It seems more important to keep tearing onward. And today, Sunday, I have a shortened day. Cris expects me back at the house in less than four hours to work on some bookshelves. I just became aware I haven't had enough coffee so I'll make a few note...

Today, to start with, I want to do a couple of things. First, I'm going to go through all my notes and make lists of all the possible sex scenes I have thought of so far. And second, I'm going to put in a few things about Hap's anxiety about his apartment. That always has to be uppermost in his mind -- that anxiety should drive the book, like Yossarian's anxiety about going on more bombing missions. List of characters along with stories for them to tell: Hap: This is the one most likely to be in a suburban setting, and why not. A little reminiscent of John Updike, complete with the anal sex. Also should have something about his wife, Kara -- or probably three stories with her. Meeting her, honeymoon Peak of sexual relationship Scene which carries the seeds of the destruction of their relationship Don: Sex with a co-ed at the conservative film festival on campus (!) He might talk about something that's happened there at the cabin. Maybe in the past he brought up stri...

A little after noon; I have been here reading for almost an hour. I am at the point of the book where all the men have arrived at Don's mountain lodge. In my last session I had such a good time writing about Greg that it's made me think I should go back and make the rest of the book, or at least parts of it, more antic and absurdist. But I don't think I'm going to try to do that now; I want to keep forging ahead. So I'm at a point where normally I would get very bogged down in a sort of slow-motion scene: They go upstairs to meet Don... They have drinks and talk and then have dinner... They have the first wide-ranging conversation. Instead of doing that, I ought to do something that confounds the reader's expectations. What if Don is somehow missing, and they have to kind of deal with that? He shows up the next morning and it's all meant to keep them off-balance and demonstrate that he's at the top of the pecking order. I still need to introduce a subplo...

That whole thing with Hap having to chose between Denny and Don -- I was thinking about the Denny part as a subplot. It's actually part of the main conflict. I need more subplots. I ought to have a subplot centering on Bart, who has a comic aspect. Let's see... I think I could take the "wi-fi for all" concept and give it to Bart instead of Denny... It's too optimistic for Denny. It also fits into Bart's community-oriented work: in addition to serving on the board of the non-profit arts center in Seattle, he's also doing this wi-fi for all thing. It's like what Meraki is trying to do, only in a non-profit community oriented way.   6:15 pm -- I wrote what might be all of chapter 5 -- all about Greg. I took the idea I'd had before about how he is starting an energy drink business and totally ran with it. Even though I didn't get a start until after 12, I had a great day -- 4350 words.

The subplot (or maybe it's the main plot) about Denny trying to get Hap to join his initiative rather than Don's company -- the important thing about it is that this alternate initiative has to represent something important for Denny. It has to represent a true alternative for him personally, a different road than he's taken before. And when he decides not to do it, it's not just him fucking with Hap and moving his money to Don, it's a huge personal defeat and turning point for Denny. I wrote above: What's Denny doing? Could he be doing some kind of nonprofit thing? I can steal the "wi-fi for all" idea -- it's not that unique an idea. Maybe Denny surprises the others by having an idea that competes with Don's for attention. However, don't forget Denny is a drug addict. He's probably not doing anything. Maybe the wi-fi people have him on their board or something. And ... Denny is half-heartedly trying to recruit Bart, but basically he do...

Saturday -- again, as long as I allow myself to sleep as late as I need to (since it's the only day of the week I can do so) and perform a minimum of errands before getting to my office, I wind up sitting down to work between 11:00 and 11:30. Perhaps part of the issue is that the neighborhood is so pleasant early in the morning, and my office is do dreary. It's very dark during the morning and gets increasingly brighter, due to reflected light, during the day. An hour before sunset the room is brilliantly lit by sun reflecting off the walls of the airshaft, even though it never shines directly into the room. Then the sun goes behind a row of trees across the street and suddenly the room becomes twilit again. So when I begin work in the morning I'm bound to turn on lights. I imagine that during the winter the problem will be much worse, since the sun will not climb high enough even to reach into the airshaft and will set behind the buildings across the street earlier. Plus,...

Friday of a long holiday weekend. I should have come straight here to the office after leaving work, but I felt some resistance. In fact, I spoke of it last night to A.: I said "I actually don't want tomorrow to be Friday because I don't feel like working on my book already." After I left work I went home, took a shower, tried and failed to nap, and left the house; but even then I drove around unwilling to go straight to my writing office. Nevertheless, I drove up the block, and there was no parking place, and I felt vaguely hungry, so I finally drove to Noe Valley and had something to eat at Pomodoro, a chain Italian restaurant on the corner of 24th and Noe. It's cheap but good, and neighborhoody enough that I don't feel bad about going in there wearing only a t-shirt (while I would never wear just a t-shirt to Bar Bambino). After eating I felt more like working, so I came to my office at Bob's house. I have a couple of hours to make a few notes, and then...

I didn't get right back to it. My head of steam, such as it was, wore off and instead of getting right back to it, I did something else -- exercised and watched baseball on television, or did not exercise and still watched television. Then during the week I found myself feeling a little bit creatively tired and even depressed. I brought my laptop to work most days but I found myself resistant to thinking about the book or even opening the notes file. Friday came, and I found myself busy at work and with things to do during the evening, so I did not fuck off and come over to my office to write. So while I worked for four different days last week, this week will have only two. And I'm getting a late start today, a muggy Saturday where the fog never quite burns off but forms a glary haze. I woke up reasonably early but because I was determined not to spend time sleeping during the day -- because I have to knock off in late afternoon and go see A. -- I stayed in bed and slept until...

Early start -- 10:50, anyway. A sunny, warm day with a cool breeze -- perfect summer weather. Me in my little green cave (the office is painted green; when I finish this book, I want to repaint it so it's not quite as underwater-feeling). I feel like starting something fresh. Instead of doing the scene about Bart's first time, told at the party -- which I am having trouble getting a feel for -- I want to attack from a different angle, write a dialogue scene between the travelers. Above all, change the tone. The idea will be to show some character traits through dialogue, with a little exposition along the way. It's also important to introduce a constant sexual tone, not just from the narrator, but from the others. I'll read a little Henry Miller to prepare.